Glad To Be Alive

I'm noticing lately how often I hear a Christian say something like, "any day above ground is a good one." (Maybe this has something to do with how my peers and I just keep getting older ;).)  I find this strange, though.  Shouldn't we, more than anyone else, be looking forward to death? I mean, I am obviously well acquainted with the sadness that follows death on the parts of those who are still alive; but, even Paul knew which was better:

For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body.
 - Philippians 1:21-24

I can most relate to Paul's torn feelings when I think of my wife and kids. I realized lately how completely paralyzed by fear I have been for quite some time (well, over seven years, actually). With my dad's death when I was young, to the sudden death of a man I pretty much regarded as the perfect example of a Christian, husband, father, and friend, I have found myself terrified of "leaving my children" before they're ready.

As a wise man and friend recently pointed out, however, we are never ready for our parents to die! I should know: my mom's death four months ago really has not been any easier on me than my dad's 25 years ago. That's where my faith in God needs to come in.

Do I believe that God meets our needs? Do I believe that God gives us what we need when we need it? Do I believe that God knows best, and that His timing is perfect? Can I, therefore, conclude that I will be around as long as my kids need me to be; and that, whenever I die, at some level it is because they no longer need me?

And can I find peace in this?

I can. I must. I will.

As for whether I personally am glad to be alive...well, the logical conclusion to all this is that someone must actually still need me (a very odd concept, indeed!); so, as long as I am needed, then I guess I'm glad to be alive.  :)

Grieving, Part I

Loss is a part of life. Whether death, break-up, divorce, jobs, dreams, and so on, we all experience loss. A very dear friend of mine, who also happens to be a Marriage and Family Psychologist, recommended a book to me: The Grief Recovery Handbook, 20th Anniversary Expanded Edition (thank you, Charles!). I have been reading it for a week now, and I have to say, I highly recommend it to EVERYONE. It seems to focus on "completing" one's grief, which is something I suspect many, if not all of us, need.

The first part lays the foundation by going into all the wrong ways we are taught to deal -- or not deal -- with our grief. It is pretty eye opening!  The second part, which I just started yesterday, begins the nitty gritty "homework" of doing it the right way. With my father's death 25 years ago, five jobs in the last 11 years, a friend dying recently, several dreams, and my mom's death four months ago, I've got my work cut out for me :).

I'll be sharing from my journey as I go, partly for therapeutic reasons, and partly because someone reading this might actually get something out of it. In the meantime, please, if you think you may need this book, pick one up and get started; you'll be glad you did.

Let the digging begin!

Chick-fil-A (Oh Why Not?)

I can hardly believe it has gotten this far. When will it end? It will end, of course, no matter how passionate some are about it right now. After all, when was the last time you or I did anything for Katrina or Tohoku survivors?

Yeah, this too shall pass.

In the meantime, though, I thought I'd weigh in. I wasn't going to at first, but eh, what the heck? No one really cares what I think anyway, so why not. What's one more?

I think that Christians who are gay-bashing, declaring CFA's "record profits" from 8/1 a blessing from God, and just all around contributing to this debacle need to dig deeper into their Bibles, maybe starting with Jesus' interactions with the Pharisees.

I think that folks within, and supporters of, the LGBT community who are attacking said Christians, planning "kiss-in" type events, and the like are hurting their cause way more than they are helping it.

I think that if we don't all take a step back and get over our grand delusion that we not only have a right to have opinions but a duty to air and even impose them, we will ultimately destroy ourselves.

I think that, sadly, no Mr. King, we can't all just get along.

And finally, I think I may just attend one of these "kiss-in's" -- since they're obviously going to happen regardless of what I think -- and, as a Christian, love my gay neighbor. Who knows, I've seen some pretty amazing things happen when I actually choose to do WJWD.