America and Me

I look at the TV: your America's doin' well.

I look out the window: my America's catchin' hell.

 - Living Colour

I live in an area where I see American flags everywhere. It's caused me to really think about what it means to me, now, to be an American.

Truth is, it has meant different things at different times.

• Growing up, it was just part of life. I pledged allegiance at school. I sang patriotic songs at events. I thought we were the greatest country in the world.
• When I became old enough to vote, it meant I had a right and a privilege to make a difference, and I took that very seriously.
• When I became a Christian, it started to mean a lot less; i.e., just another earthly affiliation. I still vote, but I have gained an understanding of nationalism's rightful place in the heart and life of a follower of Christ.
• After 9/11, I suddenly felt more patriotic than ever before! I, too, wanted the evil vanquished.
• Since 2020, I can no longer pretend that America is not built on a system that benefits the few at the expense of the many, and those who will fight...and kill...to keep it that way -- all the while ignoring or denying the truth of it all.
• And there is a certain look/type of person that particularly makes me uncomfortable and nervous to even be around. Especially with my kids.
• And these last two points make me very sad.

We are not the greatest nation in the world. In fact, it's very possible that the United States has never been more divided, and this scares me because a nation divided against itself cannot stand (Matthew 12:25). At this point, we are probably more of a laughing stock than anything else. It is truly embarrassing.

The 4th of July represents something good for some, but not for all. There is no liberty and justice for ALL in this country. And until there is, we won't be anywhere near the greatest nation in the world.

I am not proud to be an American. I am grateful for certain things, but I don't think we've had reason to be proud for quite some time.

Maybe, some day, we will again. Maybe, some day, we will once again aspire to intelligence and not belittle it; not identify ourselves by who we vote for; and, maybe -- just maybe -- not scare so easy.

National Day of Prayer, 2024

Yesterday was this country's National Day of Prayer. Last night, I attended a prayer gathering put on by multiple churches and hosted by a church I'd never been to. As the night went on, I noticed a theme evolve in my mind and heart: God's plan is for those of us who claim to love and follow Him to be the lights in the darkness, and we pretty much have been sucking at that. I feel like God, starting in 2020, has served up on a silver platter a huge opportunity to shine, and we have done the opposite. We have behaved far more like our surrounding culture than the God we follow (attacks when we should have listened, silence when we should have spoken, choosing sides based on earthly ideals, etc.). As some know, my journey with my church has been a long, strange trip indeed. And indeed, it has finally come to an end.

But everything is bigger than that. WAY bigger, in fact, than which church I or anyone else goes to! Jesus prayed for His followers to be unified, and we've pretty much screwed that up royally as well. And the more I watch the world and think and pray about what I see, the more convinced I am becoming that at this point, the real hope on the human side of things lies in certain generational things just going away.

NOTE: Not all, just some. No baby-with-the-bathwater silliness. We actually need all generations to work together to thrive. Sadly, though, some things just need to go.

For one example, as we approach the season where we get to "choose" between a megalomaniac and an apparent genocide supporter, people like this young woman give me even just a little hope; not for the immediate future unfortunately, but for the longer term. I've even had the thought recently that, I wonder if the Doomsday Clock actually measures the increasing number of people who are figuring out how things really work between the have's and have-not's -- and why -- and, subsequently, how much closer we're getting to the breaking point of when enough people have finally had enough. (I'm sure it's not, but the thought really isn't that outlandish, and that's a problem in itself.)

Anyway, at the end of the day, human beings are divided into two fundamental groups: those who are, and those who are not, stupid. It seems our only real hope is that the latter group, like the young woman above, begins and continues to outnumber the former. And as "First World" Christians especially, it seems our part in this is to focus on the author and perfecter of not-stupid and let go of our culturally ingrained nonsense.

And that is something I consider worth praying for, yesterday, today, and every day!

It's Just Money

While we were out of town this past March, we got a Life360 alert that one of our kids' phones experienced some sort of sudden stop, and that one of the things this could mean is an accident. (This is a really lame experience, by the way, especially when you've already been through it once before for real.) Anyway, when we finally got hold of them, we found out that our son had left his phone on top of the car and it ended up going on its own, final adventure. Then,

1. We reported it to Verizon.
2. This lowered our bill by a good amount.
3. We told him he wouldn't be getting another one until he could pay for it.
4. Life was good.
5. Then,

We got an email from Verizon shortly thereafter informing us that, with only three phones, we would be losing whatever bundle discount we had. Ok. Cool. How bad could it be? Then,

I got the latest bill today.

$460.

For THREE phones!

So I've been calming myself by reminding myself that it's just money. It comes and goes. And really, what else can you do about something you never seem to have enough of? Besides, it's not like it's oxygen, or love. Those would be really bad things to never have enough of, right?

So, yeah. It's just money.

It's. Just. Money.

IT'S...eh, I'll let you know how it goes. (No, we won't be paying that.)

Why I Left My Church of 30 Years

It was neither quick nor easy; it was very hard and a very long time coming. And as is almost always the case in situations like this, there are multiple reasons.

The overarching reason is that they maintain their very narrow focus on what's important to God. Their foundation is "The Great Commission" when it should be "The Greatest Commandment." Jesus literally told us this (Matthew 22:36-40)!

One "sub-reason," or symptom of the above, is that they use the language of "family" but they are not. It is Corporate America dressed up as a church. Genuine friendships have of course developed, but "coworkers" is a better comparison when looking at the bigger picture:

• People sit in the same place, with the same people, having the same conversations. 
• There is a clear "org chart" hierarchy delineating who matters more.
• Your worth directly correlates to how much you contribute to the bottom line (growing the church).
• Questioning leadership will almost certainly not end well for you.

(Note on "The Great Commission": While God obviously wants everyone to be with Him in the end (2 Peter 3:9), they mistake God's Prime Directive for theirs. And we didn't even get that right(!), i.e., "teach them to obey everything..." We are called to love Him and each other increasingly well (Mark 12:28-31) and let Him make the fruit grow (1 Cor 3:7). It's almost as if they actually believe He needs our help!)

For many of us, the biggest "sub-reason" or symptom goes much deeper. It is about hurt and harm that has come from abuse, justified by their focus on "the mission," and swept under the rug. Hopefully I can be sensitive to those who have lived this literally(!), but it seems very much like finally admitting you are married to a racist, sexist, abusive narcissist, and you just can't do it any more. In fact, you should not.

Some love to say we should fight to keep the world/local culture from creeping into the church; more and more are realizing we're way past that. We have historically prided ourselves on being diverse and not like the world; however, while our membership has been diverse, our leadership and culture have been (and largely continue to be) White, conservative, American patriarchy. Again, Corporate America dressed up as a church.

And sadly, most seem okay staying on this path and definitely not okay with owning our mistakes and harm and truly working toward healing and real growth.

And this is why I and so many others have left / are leaving / will leave.

Just Another Warning To The Church

Try this:

1. Buy a cheap Bible. (I bought two of the same so as to clearly illustrate the difference.)

2. Tear out everything that is God using one or a few of His people to address the rest (Pentateuch, prophets, histories, gospels, epistles) as opposed to those "outside," and see how much of the Bible is left. I did. I went page by page and took out everything that is not God addressing "outsiders" and this is what's left:

It's worth noting that, yes most of the Bible in fact gone, but also (1) even a lot of what remains is God simply stating the judgment that is to come for the other nations ("an oracle concerning..." or "judgment on..." and (2) I left Psalms, Provers, Ecclesiastes, and Song of Solomon in because they could be argued to be universal. So yeah, not much "reaching out to the lost" in there, actually.

3. So what's the point?

The vast majority of Scripture is God teaching, reminding, admonishing, and warning His people how to live so the world can see His ways in action; very little has to do with how to be outward focused. SIT WITH THIS for as long as it takes to get that if your "faith" and/or church is built/focuses on outward, quantifiable forms of "productivity" (e.g., evangelism, church growth), something is wrong! (Extra credit: watch this video that delves more deeply into this particular focus.)

4. Keep this Bible as an ever-present reminder of what God actually wants us to focus on (Matthew 22:36-40, Matthew 7:12). Yes we are to "make disciples," but as has been pointed out for a long time now, "as we go," i.e., living as lights, not as recruiters!

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What about today? Is there something -- a recurring theme that keeps coming up -- that God may be trying to get through to the many via the few?

God's plan for His church today is the same as it was back in the Old Testament. He put the Israelites in the "crossroads" of their day so that all nations could be exposed to what it's like to truly live and walk with Him, and the church is supposed to be the light in the darkness now. This plan, however, is predicated on His people actually loving Him and each other truly, as He defines love. We obviously need all the help we can get with this; hence, the dominant focus of God's word.

In fact, if we're being totally honest, we in the "American Church" have failed miserably at this...and we will have to answer for it. Or what else do you think Jesus was trying to warn us about in Matthew 7:21-23?

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’"

For my first two or so years as a follower of Jesus, I wholeheartedly believed that this applied to "others" (i.e., those outside my church). Ever since the day I realized that this applies to EVERYONE I have considered this the scariest (as in sobering in a terrifying way) passage in the entire Bible!

Notice that Jesus does not contradict them; He does not say, "No you did not do those things." Instead, Jesus is straight up warning us that we can literally check all of our religion's/church's boxes and still go to Hell!

And in warning us, He (1) literally contrasts God's actual will with our little boxes(!) and (2) boils it all down so simply to not truly knowing us.

It is also worth highlighting that He is not talking to atheists, non-Christians, or folks of other religions, because those folks won't be saying "Lord, Lord!" This is for so-called Christians, and He doesn't say "few" or even "some," He says "many." Let this also sink in.

We read parables like Luke 18:9-14 and, almost subconsciously, see ourselves as the chest-beating sinner. What if we're wrong? Isn't that the point of the parable?? Are we really making every effort (Luke 13:24, 2 Peter 1:5, 2 Peter 1:10, etc.) or do we think we're somehow exempt from such warnings and admonitions?

Yet there is (of course) hope.

But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says:
“God opposes the proud
but shows favor to the humble.”
- James 4:6

We must choose humility and dig deep if we are to truly fight for our hearts (Proverbs 4:23), our lampstands (Revelation 2:5), and both our and our hearers' souls (1 Timothy 4:16).

Life Now

As we approach the end of 2022, what I refer to as our Blip seems largely like a memory to most. Not for me, though. I have realized lately that I am like someone who has been forever changed by, and cannot move past, a recent abuse. Over the past few years I have expected much I did not see or receive and have seen/received much I never would have expected, and it has changed me. I have been processing something that is just now starting to crystalize.

As a person of color living in America, I haven't truly felt safe since college. Unlike many people of color, however, I've never been part of a community where I did feel safe, especially to discuss such things. I have, over the past few decades, been part of a community where (I realize now) I told myself I was safe; not to discuss such things of course, but at least safe from overt attacks. I no longer have even this "refuge," as I no longer feel safe even there.

I've also realized a fundamental change in how I see America; I see two types of people. There are those who, frankly, want essentially what Hitler wanted, and then there's everyone else. The first group either forgets or denies the true origins and history of this "great" nation and seems to honestly believe a slew of things that would be laughable if they weren't all so dangerous. Oh, and I happen to live in the part of my city that is populated mostly by people in this group.

(The benefit-of-the-doubt part of me still wants to defend some of these folks, telling myself that they are "just blissfully ignorant and are only thinking about the financial side of things, especially for themselves; and, while this is certainly still grotesquely self-centered, it's not really hate and $&^%$# supremacy, right?!" This excuse doesn't really work any more, though.)

My wife has been watching "The Watcher" and today I saw some of episode two. There is a scene where Naomi Watts' character talks about how angry she is at what's happening to them, saying, "Is that what we should be telling our kids? That if somebody terrorizes us we just let them?" I choked on and nearly spit out my soup...and then said, "Welcome to Black America, sister!" I wasn't trying to be funny.

But of course it's not just Black America; it's Everyone-but-one-specific-demographic (or their cohorts and wannabes) America. My wife just finished watching "The US and the Holocaust" on PBS and I was in the room for the last 30 minutes of the last episode. It ended an hour ago and I have been crying or trying not to cry since. It is the definition of "profound" in what it conveys and how. It's not easy to watch, but I recommend it to everyone. Trust me, it's not just what you've seen or heard before!

Anyway...I find it cathartic to write out what I'm feeling, to share it, and to receive encouragement from the few who will send some. (Thank you in advance, by the way!! I pretty much know who you are at this point lol, and it means more than you probably realize.) I'm done now, though. Back to processing, navigating, and figuring out where to go from here and how to get there....

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The Westernization Of God

Do you believe the Gospel of Jesus Christ...or the Gospel of The West?

There are things I have believed my entire Christian life which simply are not true. Below are just a few of them.

Vision

Without vision, the people perish....

 - Proverbs 29:18

This passage has been used for decades to support the concept that God calls us to dream for Him and have dreams for our own lives. He does not. This is a Western concept, not at all what God had in mind. The word translated here as "vision" actually refers to divine revelation; in other words, without hearing from God (e.g., the Bible for us today), the people perish.

Hopes and goals are great. Set grounded goals and faithfully go after them, for God's glory. If, though, you insist on "having a dream for your life," you just don't get to get upset with God or lose faith if it doesn't work out. You have no Biblical guarantees of dreams coming true regarding relationships, career, where you live, or anything else earthly.

(Fortunately, in this case, even the NIV has recently been updated to reflect a more accurate translation: "Where there is no revelation, people cast off restraint; but blessed is the one who heeds wisdom’s instruction.")

My Thoughts Are Not Your Thoughts

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,

    neither are your ways my ways,”

declares the Lord.

 - Isaiah 55:8

This passage is used so often to convey things like, "well, there's no telling why this is happening in my/your life, cuz you know, God's ways aren't our ways." That is not what it's about. Contextually, God is explaining why He will have mercy on those who turn back to Him, as opposed to the typical human ways of not showing mercy or having grace.

Can this be applied more broadly? Possibly. We need to be cautious (!), though, when trying to use Scripture for something other than its original intent.

Plans For Your Future

"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

 - Jeremiah 29:11

Oh boy. So, some promises are universal (all followers for all time) and some are for the specific audience at that time. Unfortunately, this is one of the latter. God makes other promises for all of us that could, maybe be argued to amount to this to some degree, but quite simply we have no Biblical guarantees of earthly prosperity, ease, or anything else of that nature.

Turning The Other Cheek

But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also.

- Matthew 5:39

Used to teach people that we should not resist, physically or otherwise, when someone is trying to hurt or harm us, this is not at all what the original hearers took from it. In that culture, there is a big difference between your right and left hands. One is used for all things clean, the other for the unclean. If someone struck you, they were obviously in the wrong, regardless of station or status. Forcing them to strike you a second time with the unclean hand by turning your head, though, put them on display in a far more humiliating and taboo way.

Where You Live

From one man he made all the people of the world. Now they live all over the earth. He decided exactly when they should live. And he decided exactly where they should live.

 - Acts 17:26

This has been used to teach that God chooses where we live (i.e., exact address) and when. It actually refers to the times and places God determined for entire peoples, i.e., cultures and nations throughout history. Fortunately, this translation too has been updated: From one man he made all the nations, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he marked out their appointed times in history and the boundaries of their lands.

Nationalism/Patriotism

"God bless America."

Yeah, no. Jesus/God is apolitical, at best. God loves, works for, and fights for America no more than He does any other temporary human organization. We are not His people any more than anyone else (the Hebrews were for a while, but we never were). You literally cannot serve both "God and country" (same as Money); one must come first.

"Conclusion"

All I have attempted to do here is present the truth (these are just some examples) with some suggested places to start digging (below). I do this, and in this way, for three reasons:

1. By misunderstanding, misusing, and misrepresenting the word of God, we set ourselves and others up for possibly years of frustration and wasted time;
2. Once you fully embrace the fact that the Scriptures were written to a vastly different audience and culture and that this matters, you begin a journey of discovery and re-discovery that brings them to life more than ever before; and,
3. I am in no way qualified to try to lead you on this journey.

I pray you take the challenge and dig deep. I pray too that you find the same joy, depth, and new life that I have only begun to find!

Resources:

• https://www.bemadiscipleship.com/-1
• https://www.douglasjacoby.com/
• https://www.malcolmcox.org/
• https://www.thattheworldmayknow.com/about
• https://www.athensinstitute.org/